D is for "Dreams"

"A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world"--Oscar Wilde

lately i've been having the strangest dreams...

not necessarily good or bad but definitely ones that linger in the mind when i wake and always this incredible sense of...loss.

my life is going incredibly well at the moment. i have a great friend and partner in life, we just bought a new home and moved in together. i've actually been able to hold a job for more than a month (see B is for "Borderline Personality Disorder" for an explanation) but for some reason i still have this feeling of failure and things left undone.

in my dreams i always seem to be trying to accomplish "something" or looking for something.

when i wake, i can never remember what it was i was looking for, or even if it was ever very clear what i was trying to do.

so in my dreams i travel on and on. each destination leading me to another and another and another...

i thought possibly it meant that i needed some closure on a few things in my life and so i went searching for it.

the outcome...let's just say it didn't go so well.

"D" can also be for disappointment i suppose. :/